Kent UFO Hotspot
Posted by Redshield at 1:29 pm
Hello,
This week Redshield has been phoning up UFO hotlines reporting every sighting he has seen in an attempt to make Kent the UK’s no 1 UFO hotspot! Normally, Redshield averages at about 5 sightings a day, oftentimes when he’s settled on the veranda pluming on a warm bowl, however he tends to report only on encounters of the 2nd kind upwards. Having had several trips in space ships over the years redshield decided that the UFO world needs to know the truth about Kent. He is forced to admit, however, that the trips in the saucers have dried up recently after a particularly invigorating abduction two years ago when Redshield was banned from the spaceship. The aliens, who were dressed in skintight spacesuits and had very bad new age mullets, attempted to tell Redshield that humanity is doomed and can only be saved by a great and peaceful individual. All redshield wanted to do however was talk about Atlantis and World Trade Centre 7, and hotbox the craft with waves of extremely potent Latakia Blend. He also left a large amount of wrappers on the floor and left a terrible smell in the spaceship toilet. He was unceremoniously dumped from the craft and told to find his own way home. Anyway, enough of Redshields alien diplomacy, if you see anything in Kent report it! Get lost Sussex!
